5/20/13

I got waxed this weekend.  I am going to spare you by avoiding specifications concerning where or why.  But you can probably do the math.  Swim suit season + vacation next week = ....pain.  Lots of pain.  I tell you, it was a looong winter.

As I'm laying there, wincing and trying hard to avoid screaming out in agony, I'm participating in one of my least-favorite things.  I've mentioned it here before.  They call it "small talk."  To be fair, the girl I was small-talking with was considerably less awkward about it than most people I come across.  But it still had it's moments.  I mean, you can only be so personable while experiencing such discomfort.

"So where did you meet your husband?"

"In high- OUCH! -I mean, high school!"

"Oh how sweet! How long have you been married?"

"Just a little - ah! - bit - AHH! - over a year!"

"Well that's great!  So you're still in the honeymoon phase?"

To be honest, I dislike this question.  Firstly, because it directly contradicts the whole, "The first year is the hardest!" warning I got about a billion times during our engagement.  I mean, which is it?  According to these geniuses who can't keep their marital advice to themselves, the past year of marriage was supposed to be more difficult than any other year to come, AND the most enjoyable because, of course, we're mentally still on our honeymoon.  As if we somehow brought the beach and the no-cost-to-us vacation home with us.

Secondly, because I never know how to answer.  If I say yes, I come across as a naive little twenty-something who won't tell her husband to wipe his urine off of the toilet seat for the sake of avoiding confrontation.  But if I say no, then what does that mean?  That I've finally "grown up" and learned the "hard truth" about marriage?  That it's just one big joke and no matter how hard you try, after this "honeymoon" narcotic wears off, complete repulsion for your spouse is inevitable?

Are you just asking me if I still like my spouse?  Because, yeah, I do.  If that means that I'm still in this so-called "honeymoon phase," then sure.  So be it.  What. ev.

The way I see it, each day that I wake up, still married and still true to my husband is my way of saying, "Hey husband, I'm happy that I married you, and I would marry you all over again if I had the chance."

I wouldn't say it's easy, exactly.  But I would say it's simple.

8 comments:

  1. YES THIS! admitting to being in the "honeymoon phase" always feels like you're acknowledging that somewhere down the road you won't be happy with each other anymore, or you'll realize that marriage really is boring and tedious. and that's such a choice. can i not be happy, mature, self-aware AND madly in love? can we not say that yeah, we've been through some RIDICULOUS crap since we've been together, but have stayed strong and in love and best friends throughout (and that's the reason we've gotten through any of this), and we intend to be in this so-called honeymoon phase forever? people who think you can only be happy and in love while things are perfect make me sad.

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    1. Precisely! It's all a choice. Obviously difficult circumstances happen...but why does that mean I have to become disillusioned with my marriage?

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  2. haha crack. me. up.

    and that last line - i love it. so true.

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  3. hahahahahahahah dying at the picture you chose to add too lol
    THAT kind of small talk is always so awkward. but so necessary. anything to get my mind off it.

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  4. You are just the greatest. And you're totally right; how can you answer that honestly without seeming either entirely naive or too mature? I loved this.

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