From 19 to 22 seems like very insignificant amount of time.  Three years is a small fraction of an average life span these days, especially with the help of modern medicine and the fact that a head cold doesn't usually mean death anymore.  It's true, from 19 to 22 can seem like no time at all.

But, take my word for it, the difference between 19 and 22 is a big one.

Trust me, the difference between them is a lot.

I've been doing this thing lately.  I think they call it cooking?  Spaghetti squash with parmesan sauce, fajita-style quesadillas slathered in guacamole.  I may have added in more pretty words to make those sound better.  But they were enjoyable.

I've even been getting the dishes done right after we finish eating...just right then and there.  Soap, water, several minutes of standing by the sink - boom! Clean kitchen.

I'm officially freaking myself out now.  Drew probably senses something is amiss as well, but I'm guessing he hasn't said anything because he's worried that it'll make me go back to normal.  And then he'll be back to doing those dishes all alone more often than I'd like to admit.  Poor chap.

Mostly I think I had been making things more difficult in my head than they really are for the past several months.  I've lived through enough winters by now to realize that cursed season does terrible things for my state of mind.  And once the trees are budding, and the sun is back whispering encouraging things in my ears, I'm suddenly a new human.  I'm enjoying sunsets and old songs and drinking in cool breezes through the window.  I've suddenly become a reasonably productive person who doesn't let the small things bother her.  And I hate it when people say things like that.

Regardless of this, I'm still me.  And for that reason, I have to be realistic.  Realistically, I'll probably be right back to my usual, over-complicated, skeptical way of thinking by the end of the week.  I'll most likely be back to dreading even the smallest, simplest tasks.  But, right now, life feels completely doable.

I like doable.


  1. Cooking isn't super painful for me, its the coming up with what to freaking cook. that part just drives me mad.

    Doable is pretty dang fantastic. ^_^

    1. Oh, I so agree! That's by far the most difficult part. Well, and the shopping for it. I hate that.

  2. i seriously feel like i'm in narnia or something - that winter's NEVER going to leave. but these last few weeks since daylight savings, the extra hours of light has helped SO MUCH. i keep looking at the forecast and the warm weather never gets closer, it always stays at the bottom of the 7 days, but it's not going away either. and doable. some days i say that to myself a lot, or something like it (just this one moment, just get through this).

    1. I honestly don't know how you're doing it! But it really is crazy how big of a difference more light makes, I totally agree. Getting off work at 5:30 to it already being night out was killing me!

  3. This was the first year when those "winter blues" just really got to me. I never realized how much of an effect light and darkness have on a person. But I'm thankful for the seasons we have - a somewhat reminder of the seasons we travel through in life.

    "And once the trees are budding, and the sun is back whispering encouraging things in my ears, I'm suddenly a new human." I feel as though I've thought that exact thing only in much less eloquence.

    As always, thanks for sharing your thoughts. :)

    1. Oh yes, those winter blues are completely legitimate! Humans just need sunlight. But I agree about the symbolism in the seasons, it's interesting to think about. Thank YOU for the nice comments.


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