what did you call me?

My cat is so cute.  Also, I finished an entire burrito from Taco Time today.  That's never actually happened before.

On Friday night, Drew called me Megan.  I know that seems normal because it's my first name and all, but it was strange.  He never calls me Megan.

It's either Meg or a term of endearment.  That's it. 

And as far as what I typically call him, his name could be legally changed to "Honey" and my life would be no different.

Do you and your spouse/significant other/partner/companion call each other by your first names?  Or are you more like us and probably drive other people crazy by using pet names?

If you're single, well, you know what to do...

a good one.

"Wherefore, whoso believeth in God might with a surety hope for a better world, 

yea, even a place at the right hand of God, which hope cometh of faith,

 maketh an anchor to the souls of men, which would make them sure and steadfast, 

always abounding in good works, being led to glorify God." -Ether 12:4

Is there a certain spot that you drive past on a regular basis that you find particularly visually appealing?  And every time you pass it, you think, "I love that place, I should take pictures of it someday."  Well, I have several of these places, this park being one of them.  It's in Cedar Hills close to my parent's house, and it is especially lovely in the Fall.  (What isn't?)  It's become a personal tradition for me to take pictures of it at this time of year.  It's so very photogenic.  Just look at it, showin' off.

This weekend was filled with nice and enjoyable things, including mine and Drew's favorite thing to make - grilled Italian turkey sammiches.  Deeelish.  Additionally, I didn't get ready at all on Saturday.  I just washed my face, brushed my teeth, and put on a beanie after a glorious sleep in session.  That's what I call living life to the fullest.  Which probably makes me one of the most boring people you've ever heard of.

Pretty sure the moon was celebrating Halloween last night.

Hope you had a good one.

good words.

"If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you."
-John 15:19

today.

"But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed."

"All we, like sheep, have gone  astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquities of us all."

-Msh 14:5-6

I don't know why it's so satisfying to find or come up with words that describe my feelings perfectly.  But, to me, it's one of the keenest pleasures I know of. (See?  I'm boring.  Like Mr. Rochester said, "then your pleasures have been few.")  And it seems that my whole entire existence is one big quest to do that.  To take a whole mess of thought and emotion, and condense it.  To organize it, shave off the excess, until I'm left with nothing but the true, the innate, the primal.  To spit and polish until I describe all of these feelings in a few simple sentences.

D&C 50

I always come back to it.

25:...and I say it that you may know the truth, 

that you may chase darkness from among you;

The Best Gifts.

There is this difference between open-minded and open to anything.  You're under the impression that this is setting you apart.  But that's the kind of thinking that got you lost in the first place.

D&C 46: 7-8

7: "But ye are commanded in all things to ask of God, who giveth liberally; and that which the Spirit testifies unto you even so I would that ye should do in all holiness of heart, walking uprightly before me, considering the end of your salvation, doing all things with prayer and thanksgiving, that ye may not be seduced by evil spirits, or doctrines of devils, or the commandments of men; for some are of men and others of devils."

        -Ask of God: Pray, include Him in your choices and struggles; He gives liberally, and has the answer.

        -Follow the Spirit, do what it tells you.

        -Holiness of heart: honesty, sincerity.

        -Walk uprightly: clear conscience; guilt-free

        -Consider the end of your salvation: THINK before you DO; make choices based on what you want most, not just what you want right NOW; consider what God wants for you, realize that is what will make you happiest (even if you don't see how right now), and make the choice He wants for you.  If it isn't what you want, continue to do this over time,  and it will be what you want, too.

        -All things with prayer and thanksgiving: Include God, and thank Him; be grateful in general - you're blessed.

        -Seduced: flattered and enticed; it isn't unenjoyable to make wrong choices, that's why so many people...make them.

        -Why do this stuff?  To avoid being deceived and lead away from the truth, and being convinced of "doctrines of devils," which is anything contrary to the word of God.

8: "Wherefore, beware lest ye are deceived; and that ye may not be deceived seek ye earnestly the best gifts, always remembering for what they are given,"



favorites.

"O all ye that are pure in heart, 

lift up your heads and receive the 

pleasing word of God, 

and feast upon his love; 

for ye may, if your minds are firm, forever."

-Jacob 3:2

"It must needs be that this is a good seed, or that the word is good, for it beginneth to enlarge my soul; 

yea, it beginneth to enlighten my understanding, yea, it beginneth to be delicious unto me."

-Alma 32:28

"...Bear with patience thine afflictions, and I will give unto you success."

-Alma 26:27

"And if ye shall say there is no law, ye shall also say there is no sin.  If ye shall say there is no sin, ye shall also say there is no righteousness.  And if there be no righteousness there be no happiness.  And if there be no righteousness nor happiness there be no punishment nor misery.  And if these things are not there is no God.  

And if there is no God we are not, neither the earth; for there could have been no creation of things, neither to act nor be acted upon; wherefore, all things must have vanished away."

-2 Nephi 2:13

"And see that all these things are done in wisdom and in order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength.  And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order."

-Mosiah 4:27

"..Wherefore, the guilty taketh the truth to be hard,for it cutteth them to the very center."

-1Nephi 6:2

"The pleasing word of God, yea, the word which healeth the wounded soul."

-Jacob 2:8

"For I pray continually for them by day, and mine eyes water my pillow by night, because of them; and I cry unto my God in faith, and I know that he will hear my cry."

--2Nephi 33:3

"..If I do not, by any means, get shaken from my firmness in the spirit, and stumble because of my over anxiety for you."

-Jacob 4:18

"But let patience have her perfect work,that ye may be perfect and entire,wanting nothing."

-James 1:4

"Nevertheless, I did look unto my God, and I did praise him all the day long; and I did not murmur against the Lord because of mine afflictions."

-1Nephi 18:16

"Be patient in afflictions, for thou shalt have many; but endure them, for, lo, I am with thee, even unto the end of thy days."

-D&C 24:8

"And that which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day."

-D&C 50:24

"And the light which shineth, which giveth you light,is through him who enlighteneth your eyes,which is the same light that quickeneth your understandings."

-D&C 88:11

"For the mountains shall depart and the hills be removed, but my kindness shall not depart from thee, neither shall the covenant of my peace be removed, saith the Lord that hath mercy on thee."

-3Nephi 22:10

"...They were numbered among the people of Christ; and their names were taken, that they might be remembered and nourished by the good word of God, to keep them in the right way, to keep them continually watchful unto prayer, relying alone upon the merits of Christ, who was the author and the finisher of their faith."

-Moroni 6:4

"For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam,and will be for ever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint

through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive,meek, humble, patient, full of love,willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father."

-Mosiah 3:19

"Scriptures are like packets of light that illuminate our minds and give place to guidance and inspiration from on high." -Richard G. Scott

"True doctrine, understood, changes attitudes and behavior." -Boyd K. Packer

2 Ne 26:

V 10. "...and they sell themselves for naught; for, for 

the reward of their pride and their 

foolishness they shall reap destruction..."

Nothing is worth it unless it's God's.  Anything else leads to destruction, aka: suffering, misery, etc.

11.  "For the Spirit of the Lord will 

not always strive with man.  And 

when the Spirit ceaseth to strive

with man then cometh speedy 

destruction, and this grieveth my soul."

The Spirit doesn't make us do or feel anything.  It is our choice to be worthy of the presence of the Spirit.  When we choose not to have it with us, we don't live like we were meant to.  We don't have time not to have it; we have too much to do.  Make the choice to become who you were meant to be, who you want to be.

13.  "And that he manifesteth himself

unto all those who believe in him,

by the power of the Holy Ghost...

according to their faith."

He wants us to know him.  We know Him through the Spirit, which we must live worthily to have with us.  The Spirit gives us knowledge of him through our faith, which makes all of this possible.

15.  "... and all those who have  

dwindled in unbelief shall not be forgotten."

Mercy.  Comfort makes no demand for perfection.

28.  "Behold, hath the Lord 

commanded any that they should not

partake of his goodness?  Behold, I

say unto you, Nay; but all men are

privileged the one like unto the other,

and none are forbidden."

Again, He invites us to know Him.  No person is exempt from the love of God.

31.  "But the laborer in Zion shall 

labor for Zion; for if they labor for

money they shall perish."

Work because you love God.  Working for anything else leads to disappointment.

33.  "For none of these iniquities 

come of the Lord; for he doeth that

which is good among the children of

men; and he doeth nothing save it

be plain unto the children of men;

and he inviteth them all to come

unto him and partake of his good-

ness; and he denieth none that come

unto him, black and white, bond

and free, male and female; and he

remembereth the heathen; and all

are alike unto God, both Jew and

Gentile."

The loving nature of our Father.  It really isn't such a mystery.

Simple. Not even easy.

“How can you and I really expect to glide naively through life, as if to say, ‘Lord, give me experience, but not grief, not sorrow, not pain, not opposition, not betrayal, and certainly not to be forsaken.  Keep from me, Lord, all those experiences which made Thee what Thou art!  Then let me come and dwell with Thee and fully share Thy joy!’”  -Elder Neal A. Maxwell

When I first read this quote, I laughed.  I read it today, and felt like shooting myself in the foot in an attempt to clear these endless concerns with myself from my brain.  There was no actual shooting, I'm not that committed, but I found that I've lost any sense of gratitude lately.  I had this idea in my head that I wasn't "doing anything wrong", therefore everything should be working out perfectly.  Don't get me wrong, because I do feel I deserve a lot.  But what am I doing here if I'm not learning or growing in any way?  

I was reading in Ether, Chapter 12 the other night, and came upon this verse:

4.  Wherefore, whoso believeth in 

God might with a surety hope for a 

better world, yea, even a place at

the right hand of God, which hope

cometh of faith, maketh an anchor

to the souls of men, which would

make them sure and steadfast,

always abounding in good works,

being led to glorify God.

I was feeling a loss of hope for a bright future.  I didn't feel like my family would ever be whole or "normal" again.  I didn't understand why people didn't seem to see me as worth their time.  I mean, I'm a nice girl, I should have an overwhelming amount of people wanting to be around me, right?  So where are they?  And why can't I afford nice clothes like that girl, and why can't my house be sparkling clean without me doing any work, and why can't I at least have a really outgoing personality, or have a good hair day for once,  and why don't I have everything I want right now?  I deserve it.  I'm entitled to it.  Right?

6.  ...faith is in things which are hoped for 

and not seen; wherefore, dispute 

not because ye see not, for ye

receive no witness until after the

trial of your faith.

Just like the quote I began this entry with, I had heard this scripture so many times I couldn't even count.  I read scriptures everyday, and I begin to think that means I know all they have to offer.  This scripture was very humbling; I don't know a fraction of it.  I get so caught up in what I want now, I forget what I want most.  Hoping for a brighter future, for a more wholesome family situation, for a clean house, for good friends who care, is a blessing.  The fact that I know these things are possible (as long as they are righteous desires) through living the right way and staying close to the Lord is a huge blessing.  Hoping for these things is a blessing.  I shouldn't complain because I don't see it right now.  I need to have faith in that my Creator knows who I am, better than I do.  He will lead me to who I'm supposed to be, who I came here to be.  It is prideful to think that I know who I am, and where I am meant to be better than the Lord does.  He knows, and He wants to show me.

9.  Wherefore, ye may also have

hope, and be partakers of the gift, 

if ye will but have faith.

I just need to remember to ask, and be humble enough to hear the answer.  One of my old friends sent me a quote in a letter while he was on his mission:  "Patience is the capacity to endure trouble, delay, opposition or suffering without becoming angry, frustrated or anxious.  It is the ability to do God's will and accept His timing." This is found in PMG, chapter six.  It applies to almost every situation, if you think about it.  The trick is...to think about it.

12.  For if there be no faith among

the children of men God can do no

miracle among them...

If you want to see results, have faith that the results will come.  If you want God to do something for you, let Him.  He can't do anything for you if you don't have faith that He can.  In 3 Nephi chapter 17, Christ is about to leave the Nephites (v 4), but He has compassion upon them, and tarries with them a little longer.  I find that so powerful.  It's something so small and so simple.  Yet, a lot of the time that's really all I need from others - just to stay...because they want to stay with me, because they sincerely enjoy my company.  Anyway, Christ stays with them, and says in verse 7 to bring any among them who are afflicted in any manner to Him.  "I see that your faith is sufficient that I should heal you (v 8)."

So, basically, I'm human.  No surprises here.  I love the scriptures.  I love the gospel.  I don't want to know who I would be without it.  This is the only place that I find real, lasting peace.  It's something no one can truly understand until they feel it, and it is easily forgotten.  Sometimes I forget.  That's probably why "remember" is the most used word in the scriptures.  Go figure.  "REMEMBER, and perish not."  -Msh 4: 30.

"But let patience have her

perfect work, that ye may

be perfect and entire,

wanting nothing.."

-James 1:4