"Don't they know you're supposed to have a last name?  It's like they're an entire generation of cocktail waitresses." -Kathleen Kelly

Today, there is a really nice zit right smack-dab in the middle of my forehead.  You couldn't miss it even if you tried your hardest.  I like to call these "third eyes."

Today, I think I may have broken the rice cooker after dropping it because it hurt my burnt finger too badly to hold it any longer.  It made a lot of noise when it hit the floor.  Sure hope it works tonight, I was too late for work to check.

Today, I've come to realize that I use my pinky a lot.  Mostly because it stings real bad whenever it touches anything. Because this pinky is the burnt finger that I mentioned earlier. 

Today, I tried to help push a lady's car out of some ice.  It didn't work.  Awkward.  I mean, what do you say?  "Well, it looks like I'm missing about ten pounds of muscle mass that I would need in order to be of any use to you.  ...See ya!"

Today, I forgot salad dressing for my lunch.  What am I supposed to do with all of these vegetables?

Today, I'm annoyed because a few months ago, Drew and I had a bounteous amount of tupperware.  And now we only have five containers.   It's like losing socks in the laundry, we'll never know where they go.

 Today, I didn't even do my hair.  I just wet down the parts of it that were sticking up when I got out of bed.

That's actually everyday.

Today, I will be 22 in a week. January never seems like much of a time to celebrate, with its negative temperatures and ugly inversion.

What if I just decided to celebrate my birthday in July?  Do you think anyone would really even notice?  I mean, most of the time people just act like they knew it was your birthday, even though they completely forgot.

So what would the difference be?  Instead of them forgetting in January, they would be forgetting in July.  I think that'd be fine.

Today is not my day.

My husband scrapes the windows of my car for me every morning. This means so much more to me than flowers or even chocolates ever could.  He's too much goodness in one man.


  1. I love this post, you are so funny.

    I love that your husband scrapes the ice off your car in the morning. That is too sweet.

  2. You're a funny duck, look forward to your posts every day! and really. I mean that.

  3. I seriously love every post. You are hilarious, even on your bad days! Is that rude of me to say? I'm sorry your birthday is in January. So is Pearl and Danny's. I think all January birthdays should def celebrate in July! Or maybe both?

  4. I think the quote is don't they know you're supposed to have a last name. but I could be wrong so don't quote me on it. thanks for your comment on my blog. :)

    1. Whoops! Thank you! You're absolutely right.

  5. I'm laughing. Lots. You're so dang funny Meggy. Hillarious! (PS it says unknown, but this is your brother. You're favorite one.)

  6. one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite movies. second only to the "bouquet of freshly sharpened pencils" quote which steals my heart every time. :) of course... a line about scraping ice off of a car would totally steal my heart too, were it in a movie because that is pretty dang cute. you're a lucky lady!


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