my brain.

At what point do I decide that I'm giving in to doubt or just dismissing solid logic?  Up to this point I always took comfort in the fact that the life I lived was guided, that I could weather any storm under the shelter of my own agency. That I now can't seem to locate. 

Why can't I feel that approving push in the right direction?  Was it decided that I simply grew out of a need for direction?  Because I only think it right that I be involved in such a great adjustment.  At least some sort of notification in advance should be required.

All I can think is that I've done what's been asked of me.  I might have expected more out of it than what was realistic, but I can't say I blame myself for that.   A sense of peace, a lack of doubt, and a heart full of love.  So what happens when I've caught up to all of the plans laid out for me.  What happens now that I'm the one in control.